Cerpenista - Ayo Ngarang Gotong Royong!

First-first, we buy the 'know'. Where? We can go to market or supermarket. There, will be many very kind of 'know' that we can buy.

but be careful!, "where-know" you buy a stinky "know" that make you "men chair red".

Don't forget to buy the catch-up.. de bes is alphabetical catch-up (kecap ABC).

and also the chilli. If you like spicy, use chilli-chilli small. More small, more spicy. Don't use paprika. The spicy is lying (pedesnya boongan).

cut the chilli small into small pieces and mix with bombay onion or red onion crush-crush a little with ulekan. put aside.

Before start cook, wash first the know until clean. Look-look if there is dirt sticking, wash more until gone.

use brutal force if necessary. if know not white put into whitener, turn-turn in whitener until flat the color.

although it didn't make the best way to do it,but keep it up!

Cut the know to make little squares, and enter the oil after it's hot. Don't test with hand, if swollen not responsible..

Heart-heart with oil that spill-spill. If touch the hand, shower with water cold.

Not need to cook long time-long time, if the feel is long enough, take the know. look color golden at the know, if so, is ready.

also you can imagine how yummy if you eat it when the weather is cold-clod.

whatmore if rain is going down. Ready too a plate of rice to eat together. But before, we should continue cook. After the know already ripe, get out of the oil and put in a tissue, so the oil will gone.

meantime,get add some paper and salt in the bowling jar.

you can try the know to taste. If not salty, add salt more. But heart-heart because hot!

if too hot, blow-blow little so it will become cold, but before, shake-shake the bowling jar so the salt will flat.

dont forget to check you cholesterol before you eat it,cause there are too much salt on it.

if cholesterol check in is good, eat with pleasure.

if cholesterol check is no good, give the know to tetangga. Not forget to say the know is low cholesterol.

if the tetangga want accept the know, you can request them to give you other kind of food as barter.

if laddership (tetangga) dont want give food retaliation, you take the know to other laddership.

If no exist from you laddership want the know, you can sell the know but no til the know bid to low because you will lose out.

If necessary sold with the force..."May the force be with you "know" ".

Back to kitchen. Take ulekan and take onion and chilli which done crushed put into bowl, take catch-up a bowl, and put into bowl. so the catch-up mix with the onion and chilli.

don't forget to sliced the know..sliced 'em tea peace- tea peace...and remember..u have to heart heart...sliced it very slowly.

if you not slowy-slowy, know maybe crush-crush.. so the know not can serve.

the end... you life if you know that "the know" was expired (kadarluarsa).

but dont worry laah... Know expired still can use if have some onion to make gone the smell anyir. Cut one fruit onion cube-cube, and mix with the know. The smell anyir will gone and replaced with taste onion which delicious! If you no like onion...

use petey, small-small green chilli, it smell very powerful.. wont go away for three days.

especially if you touch eyes after cut chilli. your eyes will sick and feel hot. you will forget all the smell no delicious from the know.

if you feel hot in your eyes or throat quick wash it with cold water and dont forget to tell the doctor.

if the doctor is not open...just go to the laddership, maybe they know how to cook "the know" without dangering your eyes.

next river, dont play play with me, if you want to play eyes with my wife!!

OK next...!

After all finish yet,compared with the picture, if the difference (you failed,fool), repeated from the fourth step.

Must very remember : Heart-heart when cut the know, dont until you no intention cut your finger. If yes, ready medicine red and cotton also tensoplast for helping first.

If no, continue cook with awarefulness. the oil will bubble many. the know will seen float. the smell waking passion for eating.

"Sst,you're hear that.The oil boiling sounds, must be Plurk,Plurk..before you doing next step.".

Hmm.. but now smell already nyos's mother (hmm.. tapi sekarang aromanya sudah mak nyos).

So,tested it!Emmh,the taste is sheep marcu's sheep (hmm.rasanya sip markusip!).

and dont be shy-shy cat if you stomach sound like marching band,eat it fast-fast before your neighbour see it,because like and indonesia motto say "be are c path as L see La mate".

I'f ur stomach start sounds like marchin band...hunt hunt go to the little room before its to late,and dont forget to drink medicine sick stomach...

hhmmm... make sure you not fart - fart here. Not Funny!

Fart? maybe you just wind enter...but if you fart try to make as silence as possible...it'll make people Narketing...

and also you can make a song from you fart,example like a folk indonesia song.

ouw, yea rite...we can sing together...Fixing A Broken Fart...

Hmm.. if you start fart, you have wind inside (masuk angin)...

I can fart without any information and sometimes it goes without saying that you will send the letter to me again because nobody loves me like you do, another day in paradise, by phil collings, sometimes when we touch but home by the see. To be or no.

If you have wind inside, your body is not delicious (badan ngga enak), go to Center Health People near you.

Hmm,before enter wind continued.Lets start cooking rice for frien fry 'know'.I suggest used "King Cat fish" rice (beras rojolele).

Because it's other than nice the smell, also very delicious to the tongue.

and because many of you friend have helped you to cook,i suggest you to go to mak erot to make you rice more bigger.

Opsss.....Mak erot is dead. yup, exactly mak erot can't cook.

Not to talk about people who is dead lah, not good. But I not delicious to say bad bad about other people. I promise not play play about this.

Okay, enough about mak erot. Remember, size not sure mirroring ke-delicious-an. Sometimes, rice which small-small also good. Choose rice which smell nice and colour white.

we are not talking about damien rice, condolezza rice, or anna rice. but the infamous rice-rice chicken from northside of manado. and beware, for those who are mak erot's patients, you can not eat a banana all the time eventhough banana is good.

Whatmore eat banana with the 'know'. Taste weird. If I sih dont like ya.. You may try but accept alone the risk.

i agree, banana usually is to make cool-luck , nobody eat banana with know.

Prepare the rice.First wash the rice, in Java it's call "must show see" (mususi).

Second, put the rice into the dandang and then put on the kompor until it hot and then go back the cover, close it. Dont wait until it is mendidih.

after rice is ripe, put it on plate hot-hot, the steam rescucitating taste. inviting spit.

or if it difficult for you, go to house eat padang and buy rice cover (nasi bungkus).

yeah...ricecover is a simple way 'whatagain' for 'eatnight'.

but dont try-try to eat the cover of the rice only.

if you try-try, long-long you can-can addicted and say: "tambo cie da' bungkusnye".

and heart-heart, ricecover from house eat padang has many chilli, danger to your tongue if you not usual eat ricecover padang.

you don't think so far that.

and danger for your stomach also...can-can u go to the little room.

plzzzz, turn on the "keran air" if u want "make a bowl".

if no, there will be no water to wash-wash your hole ass that smelly-nya "no to help-an" (gak ketulungan).

and you will make some else crazy becoz of your not-delicious smiley...please you can not make me shy becoz your bad habit!

and after you wash you hole ass. You have to wash your hand also. if not nobody want to shake skhake with you and have no friend.

your friend-friend won't road-road with you later.

but nobody will help you if you dont play eyes with your boyfriend.

so, instead of buying rice cover, try make the know be know mix surabaya..

Know mix surabaya is favorite family. Whatmore if complete with crackers shrimp. You also can try make the know egg which famous and delicious.

also like know rendang,know babat,know sumedang and bla..bla...bla..

now we try make know egg like common there in side-side road that. can good no?

I don't think so far that. know egg is no different to know fill Sumedang or know yellow Bogor that is delicious with soy sauce chilli red.

another variation is smashed know (tahu gejrot), be careful, too much you will pain stomach, and have liquid poopoo.

liquid poopoo is bad for social life. as michael jackson sung in "cepiriitt! cepirit! celanenye lengket!!".

thats why, you must real real know how to cook know. let stomach you no ill.. ok?

Dont be ill liver (sakit hati). If you road road to find the wind (jalan2 cari angin), please go to Semarang. We can find Tahu Pong (Know Pong).

or you can find wind to back board (balikpapan) because food mandarin good.

don't worry though sallary no up-up, for lebaran, every fruit children will receive support holiday (THR) to buy halal mandarin food no contain pig.

yes. don't buy food pregnant pig..

never. buy pregnant pig. it's not good at all and make you look like pig either (either or what i forget the english).

but I warn you.. not to buy pig (halah repost).

Pig or no pig, nothing can go wrong if you can do it right. Everybody like tahu pong at semarang. if you want the best tahu pong, it is located at jalan Karang Saru. Ex president megawati often makan di situ, katanya.

Speak-speak about pig, number one is at Jalan Bagus Rangin, Bandung. The place is OK lah, not so expensive, maknyus, but little-little smelly.

walah, it's begin to complicated...no? Feel like wisata kuliner , eh?

to make know is eat time long. not finish, finish has to be patient.

before.. people thought know that delicious, but the real, know that danger for eyes.... no trust? real-an? no trust? try plud know to eyes you. sick kan?

don't think so far that.

if think too far, when eat-eat. stomach hungry laaah..